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a gloomy day

hye and assalamualaikum
it has been a long long time ago since my last entry
seriously,many things have changed
so am I
I am officially graduated from stf and I am a srikandi
but it doesn`t matter to me
I don`t know how to start with this
but right now my feelings are mix
I don`t know how it can turn out like this
I am feeling down right now
just imagine your own sister talk bad about you
is it really bothering her when I am fat??huh
does she think that being who am I right now is my wish?
I really want to cry right now
why does she did this to me huh?
I am trying so hard
really hard
until I can`t bear with it anymore
I know sometimes she might think that it was just a joke
I didn`t mind about it at all,at first
but as she always do that,i am getting annoyed
and I am hurt
the cut is really deep and now it leaves a scar
I never judge her
I respect every single thing that she did
and it really don`t bother me
but why is she acting like that
I hate her damn much right now
and because of her,my relationship with mak doesn`t seem so well
she always did thing that will ease mak and she is overshadowing me
I am always be under her shade
everytime
she always want to win
in every aspect
I am tired
there`s nobody will understand me
all they know that I am always giving them trouble
but they don`t know the truth
oh god,i am crying right now
I am trying to improve myself
but they are always misunderstand about it
I wish one day I will be away from them




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